I think you're seeing the generational divide as more benign than it truly is. The fact that young people are taking longer to grow up, leave home and take on adult responsibilities is not so much a product of adult life becoming harder, but of outside forces interfering in family life and normal social development. I'm referring to the internet and all that comes with it, particularly social media and remote "communities" that affirm whatever identity a young person adopts, and they tend to choose identities that make them stand out and gain social status with their peers. The piercings and tattoos, purple hair and gender fluidity? It's all part of the online world they live in where it's not cool to be a "cis het" or otherwise "normal" person. They can gain status by being trans, by having a mental health diagnosis, and even by estranging themselves from "abusive" parents. Being a victim brings a higher status. And they have applied victim status to their entire generation, which they believe has been set up to fail by the previous generation. None of this is healthy. None of it helps them grow up or reach their potential.
Beautifully said! This gave me such a new perspective on my oldest, my daughter, who has been distant toward me for over a decade. It really helps me appreciate who she is and who she has become where I have previously been blinded by tears of not understanding the "Why" of her distance and of not being as close to her as I wish we could be. Great food for thought – thank you!
Excellent article! Lots of food for thought. I am also a parent who has a low-contact relationship with an adult child. Thanks!
I think you're seeing the generational divide as more benign than it truly is. The fact that young people are taking longer to grow up, leave home and take on adult responsibilities is not so much a product of adult life becoming harder, but of outside forces interfering in family life and normal social development. I'm referring to the internet and all that comes with it, particularly social media and remote "communities" that affirm whatever identity a young person adopts, and they tend to choose identities that make them stand out and gain social status with their peers. The piercings and tattoos, purple hair and gender fluidity? It's all part of the online world they live in where it's not cool to be a "cis het" or otherwise "normal" person. They can gain status by being trans, by having a mental health diagnosis, and even by estranging themselves from "abusive" parents. Being a victim brings a higher status. And they have applied victim status to their entire generation, which they believe has been set up to fail by the previous generation. None of this is healthy. None of it helps them grow up or reach their potential.
Beautifully said! This gave me such a new perspective on my oldest, my daughter, who has been distant toward me for over a decade. It really helps me appreciate who she is and who she has become where I have previously been blinded by tears of not understanding the "Why" of her distance and of not being as close to her as I wish we could be. Great food for thought – thank you!