Yes! I am gratefully a mother in Phase 3, but the work to get there was intense. I continue to hope my son heals from his PTSD, even if it doesn't mean reconciliation with me.
Tremendous first entry. I can imagine so very many people finding much needed support and solace through the wisdom you hold from your many years working with estranged family members. Thank you for sharing it with those of us on Substack!
I have been reading your articles and I really do not know what stage I am in. It has been almost 1 year and nothing. The pain and frustration has no ending. The secrets are even worse.
Thank you for reaching out. I’m so sorry to learn of your unending pain and frustration. Since the phases don’t necessarily come in any order, and do repeat, so I am going to guess you are in the Tidal Wave phase, even though you’re not at the beginning of your estrangement. I’m guessing this because you are letting us know that there’s more secrecy than before, and the intensity of the pain and frustration are unending.
I wanted to check to see if you are in any support groups. The groups can help you both by hearing other people’s families and by the help you would get talking with others about your family situation.
I can make some suggestions, but I’d like to start by seeing if other readers might have some suggestions for you. Please make suggestions for Marilyn if you have them!
I am listening to Dr Josh Coleman and trying to get some alone time. I feel that by just listening to other people’s stories and not being able talk them does not help me. I have a lot of things that would like to say but not on line
Thank you so much for reaching out to me. This whole situation is so surreal which makes it even more sad.
I am so broken. My son is being avoidant. He is very busy. He is the trustee of a disability Trust for me.
I over text when he goes silent. The more silent the more I try to give him space. Yet, he sees me in person and we get along very well. He gets frustrated and yell at me. We both have anxiety
So, a lot of this could be corrected in person. Yet he says he will come over but doesn’t do it. We are both trying but our communication has gotten worse, especially on the phone and texting. I am an empath and overthinking gets me in trouble but, my soul is crushed and some days I just long for bedtime, when I won’t feel this pain. I also have CPTSD from Narcissistic abuse
Yes! I am gratefully a mother in Phase 3, but the work to get there was intense. I continue to hope my son heals from his PTSD, even if it doesn't mean reconciliation with me.
Tremendous first entry. I can imagine so very many people finding much needed support and solace through the wisdom you hold from your many years working with estranged family members. Thank you for sharing it with those of us on Substack!
I am also writing on substack on estrangement. It seems to be a very growing trend unfortunately. I am happy that people are speajing out on it.
I have been reading your articles and I really do not know what stage I am in. It has been almost 1 year and nothing. The pain and frustration has no ending. The secrets are even worse.
Marilyn,
Thank you for reaching out. I’m so sorry to learn of your unending pain and frustration. Since the phases don’t necessarily come in any order, and do repeat, so I am going to guess you are in the Tidal Wave phase, even though you’re not at the beginning of your estrangement. I’m guessing this because you are letting us know that there’s more secrecy than before, and the intensity of the pain and frustration are unending.
I wanted to check to see if you are in any support groups. The groups can help you both by hearing other people’s families and by the help you would get talking with others about your family situation.
I can make some suggestions, but I’d like to start by seeing if other readers might have some suggestions for you. Please make suggestions for Marilyn if you have them!
Kathy
I am listening to Dr Josh Coleman and trying to get some alone time. I feel that by just listening to other people’s stories and not being able talk them does not help me. I have a lot of things that would like to say but not on line
Thank you so much for reaching out to me. This whole situation is so surreal which makes it even more sad.
I forgot to thank you for helping people in this way.
I am so broken. My son is being avoidant. He is very busy. He is the trustee of a disability Trust for me.
I over text when he goes silent. The more silent the more I try to give him space. Yet, he sees me in person and we get along very well. He gets frustrated and yell at me. We both have anxiety
So, a lot of this could be corrected in person. Yet he says he will come over but doesn’t do it. We are both trying but our communication has gotten worse, especially on the phone and texting. I am an empath and overthinking gets me in trouble but, my soul is crushed and some days I just long for bedtime, when I won’t feel this pain. I also have CPTSD from Narcissistic abuse
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