Each day has moments of stress that add up. Estrangement can add to that strain. By the end of the day, or even earlier, taking a moment for a “release” can help you have a better evening. If you can grab a few minutes, try this “release” to see if it slows down your nervous system a little.
The Gentle Neck, Shoulder, and Soft-Focus Eye Release
Best for: Releasing chronic holding patterns in the suboccipital (lower back of your head, upper neck) muscles at the base of the skull while signaling deep safety and relaxation to the brainstem.
How to do it:
Find your posture: Sit or stand comfortably with a tall spine, dropped shoulders, and a soft jaw. Let your tongue rest loosely in your mouth.
Resting on your thighs or knees (Classic & Relaxing): Rest your palms face down or face up on your thighs. This keeps your shoulders heavy and naturally anchored, preventing them from creeping up toward your ears as your neck moves.
The Soft Eye Lead: Allow your gaze to become wide and soft, taking in your peripheral vision rather than staring at a single point. Slowly shift only your eyes to the far right, letting your vision remain gentle and panoramic.
The Head Follow: Once your eyes have moved, let your head and neck follow smoothly to the right, stopping right at the edge of comfort (never straining).
The Return: Pause for a breath. Then, first shift your eyes back to the center, and let your head and neck follow back to neutral.
Switch sides: Pause briefly, soften your gaze again, and shift your eyes to the far left. Let your head and neck follow to the left, return your eyes to the center first, and bring your head back to neutral.
Pace and flow: Repeat this sequence 3 to 4 times total, making sure your eyes always lead the movement with a soft, unfocused gaze before the neck turns. Keep your breathing slow and smooth throughout.
Please let me know if this “release” is helpful. And, what else might help you with your body when you are experiencing estrangement.
Best,
Kathy
You can contact me through the Chat, the Comments, or email me: ksinsheimermft@gmail.com
This is the 10th in Dear Estranged’s Somatic Exercise Series